Woke up this morning to a terrible shock, Michael Owen is said to be close to signing for Manure. The first words I uttered out where the same ones Shakespeare used to describe Brutus’ betrayal of Caesar, ‘Et Tu Michael‘ (and you too Michael).
This seems to be another plot by Dr. Evil Fergie to get back at us Liverpool supporters however the only one who will suffer is Michael Owen. I can not believe Michael would do this, why? To revive his England career? Give me a break.
I can however point at some perks Michael will enjoy, the Manure bench is very comfortable, those nice plush seats by Ricaro are definately a step up from the ones at St. James’ Park. Of course, I am sure that Manure have also a state of the art gym and great medical staff to help Michael while he is nursing one of his many injuries. In America we do not get free healthcare so I do appreciate what is going on here. Michael Owen will get paid while receiving state of the art health care, maybe it is not a bad business move after all. Silly career move but good business move.
Walk Alone Michael,
Once you sign that Manure contract, like Anakin Skywalker you would have crossed to the Dark Side and there will be no way back.
Antoine Zammit
antoine@empireofthekop.com