An open letter to John W Henry from a Twitter Troll

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Dear Mr. Henry:

You have been ignoring my Tweets so I decided to write you a letter.

I was the one who led the campaign #KennyOut and I must say thank you for listening to me and my friends, we have been working very hard to get Kenny Dalglish fired ever since he signed Jordan Henderson. To make matters worse Kenny sent Alberto Aquilani on loan to Italy, I think Kenny felt threatened because Aquilani is also known as a Prince and princes usually take over for Kings. He should have also kept Christian Poulsen, he has continental experience and is better than Charlie Adam. Not to forget that Kenny got rid of Torres and Meireles and brought in Carroll and Downing. Carroll??? WTF? He hasn’t even scored a single goal for Liverpool.

I have spent a lot of money on Liverpool F.C. merchandise, last year alone I spent £20 to purchase all the three Liverpool shirts from this website in China. To be honest with you I don’t think they make a profit on this website ( when they can sell all these shirts so cheaply. They are not totally original but no one will know the difference. That is beside the point however YOU AS OWNER of Liverpool F.C. have to listen to me and do as I say because I spend money.

I thought it was Kenny who was obsessed with buying English players but now you have done the same thing by signing an English manager. WTF man? What are you thinking? You could have signed Jose Mourinho, Pep Guardiola or Roberto Di Matteo but no you go for the English guy. Why are you so obsessed with the English? I thought we are Scouse not English, what is going on in your head?

I hope this Brendan Rodgers guy signs some quality players, I really want us to sign players like Aguero, Silva, Robin Van Persie or Carlos Tevez. Looks at Chelsea they have signed Hazard and Hulk and who have we signed? Spiderman?

Please get things right or I might have to start supporting another team that spends money on good players and managers.

Yours truly




  1. Haha, what a muppet! He’s got to be a united fan that’s trying to make us sound like morons! No one in the right frame of mind could surely write up something like that genuinely.

    1. Erm, it’s quite clearly not genuine, the big red letters saying it’s a joke kinda gives that away.

  2. What a complete Idiot. I agree with some of the signings wasn’t up to scratch but give me Andy Carroll over Torres any day! he may not be better but at least the lad wants to be there. £20 for three shirts? what ya moaning about? seriously support United mate it’s full of spoons you will fit right in. moaning about the club spending money when you buy 3 shirts for £20 hahahaha!

  3. You are an idiot!!!

    For starters Brenden Rodgers is Northern irish not english and tbh 2 of the 3 managers you mentioned above both work for top clubs and the other is taking a 1 year sabbatical so I don’t think there is much chance of any of them coming. Secondly you hardly spend a lot of money at the club as this site you have mentioned sell fake shirts of which none of the money goes to Lfc so why should Henry listen to you when you give nothing to the club. Thirdly some liverpool fan you are when you obviously missed the games against blackburn and the Fa cup semi final against everton when guess who scored the winning goal in both matches your favourite player andy carroll.

    So my point is before you start shouting your mouth off get you facts right LFC has no time for timewasters like you so as you said go and support a team that likes to throw its money away I’m sure manchester city would be quite happy to have you

    1. Read the disclaimer it’s completely fictitious, it’s a parody and perfectly matches those fools who would call Rodgers English :P

  4. LMAO!! Looks like FSG’s plans have got the mancs well and truly rattled!!! hahahahaha

  5. Rodgers is from N Ireland not England…

    Give the guy a chance he has worked wonders with Reading and Swansea on a budget. With some decent players and a bit of money fingers crossed !

    Chelsea took a big name in AVB and look it done for them, we brought brought back KK and although I think we played well under him, we couldn’t score !?

    I do agree with you though on the Aqualani loan out… Should never have happened. He was our best player in pre season !

    Get back Aquaman, sign Gylfi s, get back Lucas from injury, give sterling a descent run and we have a shop new midfield based around Gerard’s. Then we need one wide man and I still think we should go for K Honda of CSKA to play up top with Suarez, a great player and the revenue he would bring from Japan would be huge !

    GS and Honda you get for less than £20m. Sterling, lucus and Aquaman we already own ! Another £20m for a player or 2 and job done…

    1. Dude.., can’t you understand scarcasm???? read carefully before commenting.. A great article…

    2. You stupid Guy writer ,Give Brendan a chance to prove himself.Good or bad , we’ll know on the 1st quarter of the season! Let him plan his strategy against top 6 in Premier League.Then we’ll tell John W. Henry , pay peanut ,you’ll get monkey , pay’ll get trophies.

  6. is it ian ayre? just a thought most wanted rafa back, even some players. yet its known that SG and carra, were not over keen on rafa. its well known alonso pepe agger,skrtel,and a few others wanted him back. now i wish brendan well hes going to need it,but i wonder now if SG AND CARRA had a say in them not interviewing rafa? its also know that hamman use to argue with stevie about rafa, hanman thought he was superb, stevie was not sure… for his faults rafa has a better cv than brendan and i think he would of done really well. but iam all for brendan giving it his best shot, but if theres not a big improvement next season i think the fans will not be so loyal.2 cup finals, 8th and sacked king kenny . hes not there now but rafa is will we be hearing RAFA RAFA ? if things start bad? i hope brendan gets it right we all do but only time will tell….

  7. I hope people realize this open letter was written in tounge n cheek based upon tweets. Hence the big bold red at the top.

  8. Looks like james and a lot of other commentators hae had their sense of irony surgically removed.

    So for those who are too thick to read the title “a fictious letter … from a troll” allow me to explain

    yes of course Brendan is not English – that’s the point – alot of ignorant people especially from outside NI think everyone from the UK is English. There are lots of other deliberate mistakes (Carroll has never scored) the point is that this type of twitter troll often is completely ignorant of the facts and think they are a stakeholder simply cos they’ve been buying shirts for X number of years.

    I found this post funny. You may not. That’s OK. But rushing to argue with the FICTIONAL author shows you’re almost as brainless as the FICTIONAL fan being parodied.

  9. We don’t want supporters like you. King kenny done a very good job and steadied the ship after an all time low. Do not disrespect a man that has given his life to our club and was a major contributor of what we achieved in his spells as player and manager.

    Also brendan rodgers is Irish not English. If you bother to watch football then you would know this and know swansea city passed most teams off the pitch last season, so with more quality players,facilities and money at his disposal he WILL do great things with our club.


  10. The disclaimer at the top points out that the guy made it up from numourus twitter rants! it is a great letter pointing out all the madness that the owners have had to deal with from deluded fans who want the league next season by appointing a manager who will never come by throwing bundles of money at him we don’t have!!! this is the right appointment and i just hope that these idiots who call themselves liverpool fans wake up and give rodgers a chance? if not just go and support city or chelsea because they are everything your looking for!!!!

  11. Funny – but joke or no joke would be good to get your facts right AquamanFan (and by the way I like Aquilani too, although you were certainly stretching it there with Poulsen). Rodgers is Irish, as he made abundantly clear in that first interview of his …

  12. To be honest with you most of the above were said by actual people (claiming to be Liverpool fans) on Twitter.

    Yes even claiming that Brendan is English I heard that.

    And even about Poulsen, true tweet that.

  13. nice to see some people leaving comments underlining how serious a business the internet is.

  14. Love how he claims Rodgers as being English, funny. I do agree with Aquilani should have been kept and we never should have bought Adam

  15. your an idiot aqua wanted to leave and still wants to he cant settle in england.Torres and meireles both handed in transfer requests to leave kenny wanted to keep them.Poulsen is shit worse than adam you must have not watched him when he was playing he could never keep up in the pl.Pep and mourinho where never going to come to liverpool seriously and players like rvp aguero and silva will not come either with no cl ball.Get with it takes time to rebuild a club that no so long ago was near administration fsg saved us from that so i say get behind them and the new manager or fuck off lfc doesnt need fans like you and never will.

  16. I added the disclaimer after it was originally posted but since then I am still getting people thinking it is all true.

    I have even been abused over this which really cracks me up.

    “Why did you post this stuff? Why are you giving these idiots oxygen”

    ROFL, it is called sense of humour.

  17. I’m speechless!!! If ever there was an experiment to reveal how stupid some poeple are this is it! IT IS A JOKE LETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! All those who replied in seriousness should be hiding in embaressment before going to support City!!! Well written and sadly very true…

  18. Pls FSG we need to buy good players ..winger,playmaker,striker.wingers like ryan boudebouz or ibrahim afellay or lavazzi or jesus navas and playmaker like marvin martin or munian or gourcuf or ben arfa or sessegnon or benharda or modric kagawa or mario goteas and striker like cavani or llorente or negredo or facao or lewadoski or adebayor or huntelea or luuk de jong….and pls we need good sport director fast fast……never walk alone and,,,,, never lose again

  19. who is the idiot that writes this its pure poo and just support your team no matter what happens but i have feeling your not supporter.

  20. It’s embarrassing as a Liverpool fan to be reading all these comments as people get so defensive and angry about the “PARODY” letter!

    People it clearly says it was a joke and fictitious (that means its not real) its sarcastic and it does typify what some of our fans are sadly like! Some of the responses suggest that…I mean do you people have any idea what’s actually going on?

    Get a grip on life!

  21. they wnt save money…& they never told us y they doing this .liverpool in big trouble.Rafa is there allays & he’s waiting for this job.but they destroy RAFA.Pep is free but they dnt need him coz he’s to good.Van gal is also waiting for good job but liverpool owner dnt need Van gal coz he’s nt enough for this job.Capelo is also waiting but owner dnt need coz they thinking capelo is only for international job.i think next coach is Steve Kean.

  22. I think some of the comments left compliment the spoof letter completely and just goes to show you how some of our fans use their brains

  23. Guys, cool down, people are fairly obviously reading the post first, then the comments after, ok they may not understand the word parody or irony but ironically, a lot of them would probably be parodies of Liverpool supporters, calling for Kenny, Rafa, Carroll, Hendo or Lucas’ heads at the first sign of trouble. YNWA my ass!

  24. We often see through posted comments that many people can’t write. Now we see how comments show that many people can’t read!

    Almost funnier than the article itself.

    Lol, lol, lol

  25. I have never come across soooooooooooooo many thick people in one post, well written, sadly not all of the people seem to understood it

  26. This website must make its money by how many idiots respond to idiots letters.Damn,yez just got another idiot to respond.

  27. Anyone taking this serious, with the BIG RED DISCLAIMER posted, is wound way to tight! It’s called a joke. Have a beer and relax…

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