Breaking reports have surfaced that Chelsea’s new misfiring number nine Fernando Torres is reportedly planning a summer return to Liverpool Football Club.
A spokesperson for Chelsea said, ‘Fernando has expressed a desire to leave the club for pastures old and has indicated that Liverpool is to be his destination of choice, his agent has told us that he’s not happy and the main reason being that he’s upset about the amount of traffic within London’s city centre which makes shopping for hair dye a ******* nightmare.’
Chelsea owner Roman Abramovich has told Liverpool Football Club that if they wish to resign the Spaniard that an offer of £11,000,000 will be the minimum that they expect in regards to an initial fee. Sky Sports News managed to speak to a CFC (Chelski Fan Club) spokesman about the shocking breaking news. Super fan Sep Blatter said, ‘To be honest its a huge blow, he was one of the most attractive members of the side and had increased female attendance figures dramatically, with players like John Terry and Ashley Cole now once again at the forefront of our female sex appeal, figures are likely to take a huge downward swing almost immediately.
Torres has scored 0 goals in 8 games since his January transfer from Merseyside providing an impressive goal scoring ratio of 0 in 8.
There’s been no officially word from any Liverpool officials but the unofficial word is, ‘Chelsea can keep the blonde haired traitor and we’ll keep the £50 million we scammed them for!’
We’ll have to wait and see how this story develops.
YNWA
Ha ha ha ha a very good attempt at APRIL FOOL
1st April
So its 1st of April… Here we go ;)
Love it! First April fools article on the west coast of US.
LOL! Nicely done.. the 1st day of April is fantastic isnt it :D
YNWA
this had me in stitches!
April fools, etc.
Hey guys, its worth the £50 million to just laugh at a great club playing in the Europa league and get beaten time and time again, if you even manage to qualify for that.
Lol, bulls***. Even if it was remotely true Chelsea wouldn’t sell him back for 1/5 of the price we sold him for.
Omg you got me… I was soooo pissed when I found out. Bellend of the month goes to me. -.-
YNWA.
yeah yeah April fool crap just like Koptalk which stated Benitez to be re-appointed at Liverpool. Torres is not welcome at Liverpool even on a free
u know n i heard messi saying that he is only gonna play for liverpool….
no its not a wind up i made a mistake please take me back , im not happy here
Very well done. haha. YNWA
my arse he is
This make me laugh out loud! Good job EOTK!! :D ye, don’t let the Traitorres comes any near us again :p
you certainly got me… well, initially!!
But it’s not all a joke. John Terry and Ashley Cole really are the pits in attractiveness.
Good April Fool’s joke to show that the player is a fool really.
Absolutely pissing myself!
what a f******* craps
April fool. Lol
I enjoyed that one!
haha very good one
Ya Ya 1 April we would not have him back any way
Crap
Brilliant april fools
Too good….or bad….to be true!
I wish he beg us for a return and we say “Get lost u traitor..!!!”
thnkx 4 e Aprils joke ….. A good read too .
TORRES left for Chelsea ,their is no room for such a player and in livepool we believe no player is bigger than the club YNWA
Might as well have been true, especially the traitor bit. We traded the sod for two much better frontmen and the Fools joke is on Roman!
Superb!!
You are naughty but very funny!!!!!!!
But mate he hasn’t had blond hair for months. Perhaps you have been watching the wrong player with the wrong club. ha ha ha ha
In fact, he did play better when he had blond hair!
this is a very nice april fool,but i want to assure that LIVERPOOL fans does’nt fail into april fool and even if its manufactured to be true LFC can’t ascept any relationship with a betrayal like f.t.
wont take him on free because he would demand a huge salary. CHELSEA U CAN HAVE HIM
Perscriptions in Scotland are from today FREE FOR ALLLLL even if they are working! joining Wales and N Ireland where this has been the case for a few years now, leaving England and the English the only ones paying for Perscriptions, and actually they rose today by 30p too!!.
April FOOLSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!
Oh no wait….er shit its true!.
Good effort still not as funny as wen I read Chelsea paid £50m for a player who is always injured, not scoring and who’s best is past him. Now that had me laughing! 1 player out 2 world class in)
ahahaha this is one 1 of 100 April Fools we get today .
bluemel,its gonna be funny when u can’t play in europe cos u spend more than u earn in revenue theres 2 english teams that fall into that catagory and they both play in RED AND WHITE good luck when the ruso gets bored
April fools finished at 12.00 midday
Alan 3 clubs, Arsenal are in that catagory aswell, Uefa and sports writers themselves have said 2 club’s to benefit from this new ruling are Bayern Munich and Arsenal.
But i don’t see Uefa having the bottle to throw teams out especially the likes of Chelsea even if they do over spend, the sponsors who pay in the region of 800 million in advertising a season in CL will end up pulling out if the clubs are thrown out, after all its called the CL and the big clubs should be playing in it. But i do think it will make clubs like Man Shity and Chavski think and spend wisely……YNWA
Seriously?????
Try harder next time dude
ha ha ha april fools how sad (please try again later)
fernando who????
thank god its april fools! dont want torres back! We have King Luis and King Andy!
Lol just as funny as when I saw an article saying Jose Mourinho was gna replace King Kenny
Torres will be the only April fool among us,nice one.
Sorry, even for an April fool joke, this totally sucked for me…wouldn’t want Judas back..even as a joke!!!
LET it go Liverpool. Torres is not coming back.
id take im back and make him play in the reserve squad
HAHAHA very funny! Love it…..Chelsea can have him, Lets see how many games he stays fit for!
torres never get his form back in his life.
LOL love it, if you thought there were any truth in this then you’re really slow, all it is really is some banter that makes Fernando Torres look like a real idiot LOL
torres will get his form back in the match against stroke and will score a hatrik ….i bet…
Your a club that a world class striker does not want to play for, says a lot itself. And 50 million is bargain, 35 of it went to Carrol.. Don’t know whether to laugh or cry at your stupidity
Dude get over torres, you sound obsessed. Why the frik do you even care.
Fuck you tosser Torres aint comin back end of you git i would like it if you stopped posting shit
hate torres and owen, never even speak of them at all, end of the line they are.
we are going to move on and thats that!
Don’t know why people are saying get over him etc, it’s a joke and I pissed my self laughing when I read the article. Respect to the author! YNWA
If torres did want to come back he would do well if he rememmbers his first goal he scored against chelsea an all u saw was a big fat person pointing at him like wat a doushe if he did come back i would favour suarez to start until he put in a request we wer laughin in chelseas faces next hes down stanford bridge gettin a 5 year contract signed i love this skrtel scored today hes scored at least 2 this season torres has 9 this season with liverpool i was lolling so hard when torres didnt evan score 1nc for chelsea think of his ratio it would be 14:0 if he scored none for chelsea that would be some ground to cover in just 1 season he wont do as half as good as he did at liverpool the only reason he is worth ’50 millon’ because the squad made him that good so he hasnt got the supply which he had at liverpool
We nw hav suarez and aquilani so back off Torres.
its disgustin bt once again interestin if only there is trueth in it.Torres was a big lad nd wud lyk to hv him back.cn’t wait to c lininction of torres,suarez up front, downing,stevie,lucas,bellamy/kuyt in de mid nd enrique carra coates johnsen nd reina at the back.
fuck off torres….we now have SUAREZ
4gve dis guy,after al he is jst a humam.cnt wait 2 c him playin 4 d kop again
torres i love you your amaizing i think we should have you back :)
For 15m, sign him back ^_^
Alright people, the rumour is torres, is supposedly going to be back at anfield, personally i dont want him back, but people are saying we got 50 million for him, take a look at the figures, we spent 35 on carroll so in basic mathimatical terms we got Andy carroll plus 15million, which i can speak for everyone Carroll is shocking…
Sign him back for 20m. it will be a good buy.He is gud forward,he always love liverpool.Let us get him back.